Sunday, 1 September 2013

Freedom to commit to plan B

Isn’t there a song in there?

Lists lists and more lists. I am constantly making lists and losing them. Scrappy bits of paper litter the house. Bank, Dr, storage, letting agent, new laptop and printer, PG tips big supply of, take stuff to the dump, check out route through Europe and cost. Book flights for family out in Dec. Don’t forget things still going on here, studio sale, paint workshop, son’s birthday, catch up with friends, drive to Wales to see reli’s, deal with legal stuff,……Whaaaaaaah
I constantly have a headache. I think it’s to remind me not to forget things ! A bit like tying a knot in your hanky. I seem to be always waiting for other people to do things. Waiting… see this post in a previouslife ! and now I am even in bardo between blogs lol

Plan B is actually plan 472 c . Do I go out with 1 small bag and hope I can get everything I need there, having put my clobber into a massively expensive storage unit ? then at a later date come back for the things I need. Or do bite the bullet and  shell out,  taking a van overland (oooh that sounds exciting) and a ferry, with the understanding I may have to bring it all back again?  Hmmmm. Do I commit to a new life or do I keep one foot in Blighty in case it all goes bottoms up ? Either way it costs money. What eves, I need to do this. I have, it seems, been waiting for this my whole life. Now everything is coming together. As my daughter says ‘ I love it when a plan comes together’ ! It’s still daunting though.
Commitment is a word I hate. People bandy it about as if everyone’s lives depended on it. It leaves no room for error or a change of mind or heart. It’s stagnant and  constricting. One can have a very best intention to do something or be something, but I really believe that if the very best intention doesn’t work out, then it’s ok to take another route. Freedom. No past, no future, just taking appropriate and caring action in the now.  
Captain Pugwash returns soon from adventures on the high seas, with, I hope, an altogether fresh eye on the situation and with a sensible solution. That is before he refills his biscuit barrel, scrapes the barnacles off his bottom and sails off again on his voyage of discovery. 

So every step is taken when absolutely needed. Everything to the wire.  It’s not a lazyness or complacency but a way of calming and not becoming overwhelmed. So that’s it. Happy Sunday. Chill.




  1. Sarah, I think your plan is fantastic and very exciting! Take a deep breath and make the leap. That's what I'm doing but then I'm a nutter! xxx

  2. This is going to sound awful, but I sometimes think that a house fire where I lose nearly everything would be the only way I could truly let go. I need very little, but actually parting with things for good is a different matter.

    If it really is a matter of clothes and personal stuff - a few trunks and big boxes worth - I'd look after them for a few months for you, don't shell out for storage. If I can help, let me know. You're doing a great thing, I wish you all the success in the world.

  3. Oh Z you are a sweetheart and thank you so much for the very kind offer. However, ! I have a great deal more possessions than I can bear to take to the salerooms and I fear your house would resemble a car boot sale. I'm not sure it will all fit in a van anyway and might have to do more culling ! Thank you for your well wishes.

  4. Sarah,

    The goose led me here... I saw your post about the koan... and had to google 'Gozo' having never even heard of it. Then I find this in Wikipedia:

    "Gozo was an important place for cultural evolution and during the neolithic period the Ġgantija temples were built; they are the world's oldest free-standing structures, as well as the world's oldest religious structures. The temples' name is Maltese for "belonging to the giants", because legend in Maltese and Gozitan folklore says the temples were built by giants."

    Wow..! And your photos... pictures... are those of an artist... quite beautiful... Gozo looks to be a wonderful and incredible place to live. My wife and I are enamoured of Bali and that region of the world... we havent made it out there...

    but I see you have taken the leap of faith! I am sure your leap will not go unrewarded. I am sure your cup will be brimming over... We live in Frisco, TX... I have a couple of blogs... Tormance is one...

    I saw recently the film 'Now You See Me'... and something about it made me think of the koan... and the Mole Creek Puzzle with the nail... I could go into a long wandering thing about puzzles and koans which I will refrain from doing... but I think your comments about the goose, and Gozo in particular led me to make this comment.. I wish you the best from an unmet friend... I can tell you that you wont need luck. You have been blessed!